So as the title says , here in this blog, I would be discussing a few things which we ladies or even men can say to a new -mom.
Not being a new mom , rather helps me in this and helps me in putting forward good things to say to a new mommy , because I can share my experiences and let you guys know what I didn’t like hearing from people, and things which made me happy and brightened my day like never before.
So when Zuzu was born , there were all sorts of advice from near and dear ones , even from those who had little to do my life sooner or later. As Indian moms, we have all sorts of advice and experience stories from mothers to mother-in-law, sister-in-law, to aunties, extended relatives. The list goes on… Nothing against anyone , but here in India , it is a bit tough after a baby is born. Tough in the sense , as a new mother you really don’t know what is wrong or what’s right for your child. A thing propagated to be good by one relative might turn out to a bad as suggested by another aunt or so.
Buzz..buzz, so let’s come back to the main topic. So while people will always have infinite suggestions and advice for the little one, everyone tends to forget the new mother. No mother wants to take the credits from a baby , but in the end , she is also a newbie mother. Giving birth to a baby also means the birth of motherhood. In India, it is said that for a first few days, the mother is as fragile as the new-born , because it is her second birth. So, of course, we can shower the new mother with words of pearl and happiness.
Some of the things which I loved hearing from friends , family and relatives were:
1.You are doing a great job
Yes that’s one sentence , every mother yearns to hear. This is because as a new mother , you are doing each and everything related to the baby for the first time. And when she hears someone praising her that in doing so, she is doing a great job, her day is made .It’s like that getting a green tick or a star for your homework.
2.You are beautiful
Of course, every mother is beautiful, but as new mothers, we tend to forget ourselves. We hardly comb hair, our shower lasts only 5 minutes or so, we don’t dress or pamper ourselves like we used to do earlier. So next time you meet a mom , tell her she is beautiful. I am sure she will go back to the dressing mirror that day and admire and feel good about herself.
3.It’s just a phase , this too shall pass
By this phrase, I don’t mean anything negative .Just the other day I was talking to a friend of mine who is a new mommy to a baby girl. We had initially planned to spend our Sunday on shopping because it had been a while since she had stepped out of her house. However, she couldn’t make it and was later all sad and emotional , as to she could not go out or do stuff which she used to do earlier. So as a friend and an experienced mother , I told her that this too shall pass, in the sense the baby is going to grow up and you can take her along anywhere. I also told her once this phase is over, you are going to get emotional and miss your little one growing up so fast- a stage every mother goes through. So it’s just a phase, hold on to it and enjoy .
4.How are you?
Just as I mentioned , the new mother feels left out after a baby. This is because, in the excitement of a new child , we often tend to forget , as to how the mother is feeling after the baby. This covers everything from emotionally, to physically and mentally as well. Ask the new mother how is she feeling, hope she’s doing fine and make her feel special and happy about the whole child-birth and after process. This is particularly important because several new moms suffer from postpartum depression. We often tend to ignore it, but it can have serious repercussions afterward. In most cases, we ignore the symptoms, so it is the responsibility of the family members to take care of the lady of the house as well.🙂
5.How can I help you?
As a new mom , one is loaded with the additional responsibilities of the baby along with the house and other family members(if that’s a joint family). So as a responsible family or a friend one shouldn’t shy away from lending an extra helping hand to the new mother. This can range from buying daily essentials for the newborn and stocking up daily groceries. Friends can always ask new moms if they want them to babysit for some time , while new mom can go the beauty salon , or even shop for some time. Come on, let’s be kind to beautiful ladies out there.
P.S. – I know my friend who is a new mom is going to call me and babysit her little one while she goes out and pampers herself.
The featured image is when Zuzu was just a month old , and this is before her second month vaccine schedule.
This blog was first published here